a man stopped me and asked if there was a sprint store on myrtle. the person obviously picked me out because they could tell i was someone who knew a great deal about myrtle. i had been wearing headphones so i had to turn off my music and remove them in order to even hear what the question was.
"is there a sprint store around here?"
i wanted so badly to know the answer but it was just out of reach. i don't use sprint for my telephone provider, i use at&t, so i don't notice when i'm in the vicinity of a sprint store - they just don't blip on my radar. of course anyone who has been on myrtle avenue knows in their heart that this is a street that has a sprint store. they may not know exactly where it is, but they know it's here. i told the man, "yes, there is a sprint store around here."
"where is it?"
"i do not know."
the man laughed, so i laughed too. then we went our ways.
weeks later i stumbled upon the sprint store on myrtle. i knew i could picture it and there it was, exactly where it belonged in time and space, a sprint store on myrtle. occupying its perfect location like a god-sent strand of hair on earth's head.
i remembered the man who had been looking for the sprint store. i wonder if he ever found it? he seemed like a friendly, good person - much better than your average at&t subscriber. i decided to learn more about the sprint network community. i walked into the store and found a pile of informational pamphlets and picked one up. a man in a polo shirt inquired, "how can i help you?"
"just having a look around." i said with a smile, holding up the pamphlet in a goodbye gesture. when i pulled the handle on the door it popped right off the door-frame and stayed there in my hand. i stood there holding a long thin aluminum door handle, unable to make my exit, gazing helplessly at the man in the polo shirt. he assured me it happens all the time and instructed me from across the room on how to reinstall it.
i wondered what his role with the company was if it did not include fixing the door when it breaks off in a customer's hand. perhaps the person with that job was on his lunch break or had been recently fired. i could have asked if they were hiring but my instincts told me to to leave it be so instead i went home and retrieved the banana i'd left in the freezer that morning. it was the first frozen banana i ever ate. they do not get as hard as popsicles.
Strange resume
a woman tells you about
how her neighbors used to dress their dogs
when she lived in the trump building
like they were hollywood starlets
and wants to know if you're hiring
Appetizers
Leaves are chips
in this thin sea
we dip them in
the galaxy
Rocks and chimneys
eat for free
alongside cure
and malady
Beyond my bedroom door
Pouring a cup of coffee, stirring some cinnamon into it. It's late spring in Ridgewood, Queens early afternoon sunshine glowing off the totally white walls. The shadows of pigeons swirling around the room, dipping and diving in the clear blue sky as a single unit like fish do. From the bathroom comes the sound of running water and voices in the shower.
..wash your ass!
...hm?
...wash your ass!
...yea i know
wash the inside of your ass!
...it smells!
Bach's violin sonatas
skate across the linoleum
over the carpet
into my room
Closing my door
cinnamon coffee
the internet
birds
Joker
From 1st Ave to Lorimer St. with Andria and his girlfriend.
Valeria used to live in a squat in London. She and her friends would steal animals from the zoo; she had snakes, a scorpion, a tarantula, two dogs and a monkey. At one point she also had a giant rabbit monopolizing an unused room and a baby kangaroo who did not 'work out.' She also had a sheep whom the neighbors signed a petition to kill, and then they ate it. The monkey was named Jolly, which translates in Italian to Joker.
My wild side
go stand out in the hallway
and i'll go fall asleep
push the buzzer, don't be denied
invite me to my wild side
now take this bucket full of pears
fling them at my head
get smart if i should try to hide
i'll meet you on my wild side
invite me to my wild side
you'll get your answer there
call forth your hands
insane demands!
invite me to my wild side
pour ice water on all my clothes
pan fry this deck of cards
kindly paint the curtains grey
do not ask about my day
invite me to my wild side
can't believe i had to ask
buckets of pears don't buy themselves
my life's alive, the nouns decried
invite me to my wild side
Cat video idea
it's called "the most boring cat video ever made"
for the duration of the song Wipeout
cats sleeping and cleaning themselves
Donald
a total orphan
before he was 2 months old
/ he is emotionally stunted
teenage girls would love him
if he went to their school
and he would break their hearts
like porcelain coffee mugs
donald has less than
a kindergarten level education
/ spent his childhood in hospitals
nearly lost his tail to a lasceration
when he was only 7 months
/ had it shaved for surgery
now he's twice that age
not interested in school or girls
prefers to hang around the house
examining the space below doors
fighting plastic bags
and pushing things off ledges
Gratitude is complicated
i've been working
as a veterinary receptionist
for six years now
and i just received my first
'thank you for being good
at your job' type card
it was from the owners
of a cat who accidentally
strangled itself
on the window blinds srawstring
while they were at work
they ran in without calling
a doctor saw them right away
the cat was dead
The fable of the church bell
The church was the most impressive building in the village. The new rector came from the city where they had lots of impressive buildings. He decided to put this little town on the map.
He started a fundraiser to build a giant bell which would ring in the hours of the day. They sold high end designer shirts to raise the money and all the villagers bought them. Everyone was sharp dressed now and even though they didn't have a lot of money for groceries they looked good.
Finally they had raised enough money and the new rector rang the bell. It's rang resounded so loud and deep that all the windows in the village shattered and it was winter.